Beatrice, an EBC Trinity CertTESOL course graduate who took the Road2Spain programme had fallen in love with Spain long before she first stepped foot in the beautiful country. In today’s EBC graduate guest blog, she shares five things she learned in Spain.
Life in Spain: It started with a dream
To be entirely honest, originally, my stint in Spain was supposed to be just a one-time thing. As a planner, I thought my life course was set in stone. Get my degree. Graduate with honours. Move to Spain for eight months–just for the experience. Move back home. Then get a job.
However, as any experienced adult knows, life rarely goes the way we plan for it to. I used to think that was a negative thing, but after living in Spain for a bit more than two years, I’ve discovered that it’s one of the special things that make life worth living. The wonder…the mystery…the surprise. Without it, life would be, for lack of better term, boring.
Of all the places I could have discovered this life secret, I’m so glad it was in Spain. A magical place I now call my second home. Looking back on my journey so far, there are a handful of things I’ve discovered. Here are five things I’ve learned in Spain.
Lessons from my life in Spain Part 1: Change is a season
When I first moved to Spain, I found myself living two highly contrasting experiences at the same time. I was having the time of my life. Simultaneously, I was so homesick for my family that I’d cry out of nowhere because everything reminded me of them. However, as I met new people who had also left their homes to go on an adventure in Spain, I discovered that they also felt the same way.
Embracing it all
As someone who has always been close to her family, I found the transition difficult to embrace. Truth be told, there were days I would literally ask myself how long I thought I could keep it up. One part of me was sad and longing for the feeling of having my loved ones close to me. Another was on the brink of discovering that this new adventure wasn’t scary, but exciting. It was only a matter of hanging in there just a little bit longer and then I would start to enjoy.
Luckily, I gave in to my daredevil side and stuck it out. It’s funny because I can’t remember exactly when things changed. I definitely didn’t go from vulnerable and sad to happy-go-lucky overnight. But gradually, I began to realise that everything felt different. As time passed, I began to enjoy every moment of my life in Spain.
My Spanish flatmates went from strangers to two men I could talk to about my day and laugh with. The neighbourhood that used to scare me turned out to be a big block full of families I came to know personally. The people on the street went from strangers I would instantly be wary of to people who would greet me with a smile, with the typical Andalucian greeting, “Buenas!”
This particular aspect of my experience taught me something that my eight-year-old self wouldn’t have understood. Sometimes, change is a switch. Othertimes, change is a season.
The changing of seasons
Coming from a tropical country, I find the winters in Spain unbearable. I remember my first one. I dreaded the cold, and longed for the day when the temperatures would be warmer. To my surprise, spring didn’t come overnight. It was gradual. The change in weather didn’t happen in a snap. It happened over the course of weeks. The same thing happened between the spring and the summer.
A lot of us think that change is something drastic. Sometimes, maybe it is. But the majority of the time, it’s gradual. It’s something we must learn to sit through and embrace. Then one day you just realise that everything is different and you’re in an entirely new season of life. And it’s beautiful.
Lessons from my life in Spain Part 2: Exploring different cultures is a must
As soon as I had assimilated into the new country I was in, I got the chance to get to know the culture. In my opinion, this experience isn’t something you can get as a tourist. Because it’s one thing to visit a country and get a surface feel of what its culture is like. But to live and breathe it for enough time is an entirely different thing.
Though I know not everyone has the same experience, I feel very grateful that my overall journey has been nothing but positive. Spanish culture is very in-tune with family, community, and relationships. The value on the collective shows in how Spanish people are very sociable and like to meet up for drinks and tapas even during a work week.
People are very open and welcoming. Again, though I know that not everyone has the same opinion, in my experience, the curiosity they have towards people from outside their culture is something I don’t mind at all. Instead, I appreciate it.
Spanish culture is also more straightforward than the Filipino culture I grew up in. Though from an early age, my parents taught me to speak my mind, it’s different to be immersed in a culture where everyone else says what they think.
One of my favourite parts of Spanish culture is the work-life balance in Spain. I personally find it unmatched, as Spanish people make it a point to have time for meeting family and friends even if they have to work a lot. The culture seems to make room for it–no matter who you are or where you’re from.
The treasure in cultures
Coming from a different culture, I’d say that being immersed in a new one has changed me in more ways than one. There are studies about the positive effects of intercultural experiences, and a common theme that comes up in the findings is the change in one’s ability to understand the contexts of other people.
Though moving to a different country was challenging, I now find that it’s an experience that has helped me connect more deeply with people from all walks of life and from all over the world. Not only Spanish people, but a lot of foreigners who I have met in Spain. Because of my own experience abroad, I now find myself supporting people who want to move to another country and explore another culture. In my experience, it’s a life-changing journey that gives you the opportunity to expand your circle and make connections with so many more people.
Lessons from my life in Spain Part 3: Something bigger and better is waiting for you on the other side
A common theme that comes up in a lot of conversations I have with people about moving abroad, is the fear of being alone. Of course, in the beginning, it’s kind of inevitable. However, you really do find people–good people. People who you share similarities with.
Keep in mind, though, that your level of expansion also depends on your level of risk. To get to know people, you also have to be willing to be known. This means that you have to leave your apartment and meet up with them. If you stay cooped up for too long, then you won’t really be maximising your time.
Gratefully, in my experience, the people I have come to know have become like family. And there are so many of them. Every time I look back at the beginning of my journey in Spain, I can’t help but shake my head in wonder. I went from knowing absolutely no one, to finding people who would drive to another city just to go grab coffee with me.
We’ve all heard the phrase “What’s meant for you will find you.” I used to think it was cliche, but Spain showed me how true it is. At the same time, I’ve found that it goes both ways. As you go after what was meant for you, what was meant for you somehow finds you, and everything meets in the middle.
It’s active–not passive. I’ve always been a firm believer in putting in the work. Doing the thing, even if it means you do it afraid. You have to take the risk…you have to book the flight…you have to apply for the program. After all, what’s waiting for you on the other side of fear is always bigger and better than you could ever imagine.
Lessons from my life in Spain Part 4: Find yourself
When you spend so much time in what’s familiar, it’s easy to fall into the trap of allowing yourself to be defined by what’s around you. But the moment you step out of your comfort zone and into the unknown, you are forced to dig deep. You have no choice but to unearth a lot of things until you are left only with everything that is you. And only you.
Not where you grew up. Nor the people you hung out with in school. Not society’s expectation of you. Nor the pressure you put on yourself without even knowing why.
Sometimes, it’s necessary to step away from what you know, to find your purpose in life. Only then will you be able to stand on your own and embrace the person you are becoming. After all, it’s a process.
Spain has taught me that maybe…just maybe…this experience of discovery was always meant to be a journey. Not a test. You are allowed to get it wrong without it being detrimental to your whole life plan. Because there’s always a route back to the path that was paved for you. It’s not a pass-or-fail exam. It’s a road you get to travel on. Wrong turns, pit stops, hitchhikers, road signs, and speed bumps are all part of it.
Spain went from a strange place to a second home. A space where I felt free to learn and discover more of who I am. I think it’s a necessary journey for everyone to go on–one where you end up in a drastic change of environment. So that you can discover who you are and meet yourself on a much deeper level.
Lessons from my life in Spain Part 5: Sin miedo
As a little girl, I used to be quite the scaredy cat. I would cry at my friends’ birthday parties because the clowns freaked me out. Aside from that, I would cry when my parents would drop me off at my friends’ houses for a sleepover, even if I knew I wanted to go. I was afraid of the dark and was terrified of frogs. And I would just be so scared of so many things–making mistakes, failing exams, even if I never really did.
Though I learned to overcome a lot of these things as I grew older, it was in Spain where I became a daredevil. Little by little, I’d challenge myself to do things that scared me. I formed this habit of looking back at my experience moving to Spain for the first time and telling myself, “If I did it then, I can do it now.”
Before I knew it, I found that I had shed a whole layer of fear. To the point that anytime anything made me feel scared, I wanted to do it.
This is probably why the Spanish phrase “sin miedo” has come to be one of my favourites. Literally translated, it means “without fear.” In my journey in Spain, I have allowed this phrase to become a core part of who I am. Even though at times, I do not feel like I am the girl “without fear”, this journey has taught me that I am so much braver than I think. So much stronger than I feel. And that through life’s changing seasons, I can always be the girl “sin miedo.”
And I found that girl in Spain.
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